Unkempt

unkempt

I wrote this poem recently as I struggled with my depression again. It really has not let up in the last few months and some days it has been easier than others to just get on with things. Eventually things begin to slide and lack of concern for my own appearance also paves the way for less thought towards the dreaded school uniform. Finding the energy or inclination to worry about clean sweatshirts becomes so difficult and when that starts to slide I know I’m nearing the rocky bottom. Anyway it’s happened now and hopefully I will be on the way up again soon, but whilst there don’t I just love to write a little bit of dark miserable poetry……

Unkempt

Mummy’s depression often shows,

In the way in which you wear your clothes.

The odd socks for school for which she shows no concern,

The sweatshirt with food on, worn three days in turn,

Your unkempt appearance reveals the truth that inside,

Mummy rots deeply, black to the belly, and trying to hide,

All secrets of hatred, anger and more,

Irritable, loathing, and thoughts of escape at her door,

Your hair unbrushed for a week it seems,

Means nothing today, “can’t be bothered” it screams.

She thinks nothing of sending you off to class

Resembling the unthought-of children of your past,

Guilt laces every aspect of life,

Wanting better for you, to be a better wife.

As she struggles to do the things people see,

She also ensures that you still believe,

“Mummy loves you with all her heart”

“Today she’s just finding things very hard”

And today she hopes that things will change

Maybe there will be blue skies and a loving exchange,

That will bring a smile, will spark the return,

To a mummy with clean hair and more appearance concerns.

 

I’ve linked my poem to Prose for thought…..Click below to find out more.

Prose for Thought

12 Comments

  1. Jaime Oliver May 2, 2013 / 9:29 pm

    Sarah this is beautiful! I am sending massive hugs you know where i am if you need me xxx ANYTIME! x

  2. older mum in a muddle May 2, 2013 / 9:39 pm

    Beautiful piece – and sending you lots of hugs – depression is such a nasty beast! X.

  3. Considerer May 2, 2013 / 10:11 pm

    I am beginning to struggle myself. This sums it up well (apart from the kids bit)

    • thepuffindiaries May 3, 2013 / 10:23 am

      I’m sorry to hear that, sending positive thoughts and hopes of your own blue skies soon. xx

  4. Dragonsflypoppy May 3, 2013 / 7:50 am

    What a brilliant piece of writing. I’m so sorry to hear that you are and have been struggling.

    It’s good that you can put it into words like this, as it is something so many of us can relate to, but probably just can’t articulate as well as you. Sending hugs & hoping the clouds will pass soon xx

    • thepuffindiaries May 3, 2013 / 10:22 am

      Thank you for the hugs and support. I do finding writing it helps but I’m also aware that it makes me seem like a very miserable person but actually I’m not I just write better when I am. xx

  5. Sarah MumofThree World May 3, 2013 / 11:20 am

    Sorry to read this and I hope you start to come out of it soon. Beautiful writing though! x

    • thepuffindiaries May 3, 2013 / 12:29 pm

      This is my problem I write best when I’m miserable..told you I was a drama queen. xx

  6. Verily Victoria Vocalises May 3, 2013 / 4:12 pm

    I’m so sorry to hear that you are having such a difficult time, I’m sending you lots of positive thoughts and hugs. You write brilliantly through the hard times, but if that’s what gets you through then that is a good thing :). Thank you so much for linking to Prose for Thought xxx

    • thepuffindiaries May 3, 2013 / 4:58 pm

      Thank you, I’ve actually managed to write something much more up lifting for next week. xx

  7. Emma May 4, 2013 / 6:13 am

    Huge hugs. I know that black bellied feeling all too well. Hoping that the blue skies have returned. Emma Ps. beautiful writing as always!

  8. Mrs Teepot May 5, 2013 / 2:06 pm

    So sorry that you are struggling at the moment, am sending love and strength your way to get you through.
    A beautiful poem.

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